finding my smile: part 5

The bird a nest,
the spider a web,
man friendship.
William Blake

I didn't blog much last week. Too many deadlines at work, far too many meetings. I was drained. I still got up at 5:30 am to write, but I sat there in a daze, uninspired.

Joy robber

"All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy"

When I work too much, when each hour is scheduled and my mind is racing with projects and plans I find that my smile dissapates. In times like these I no longer see the beauty of each moment, the clouds, the flowers, my children's smiles, instead the focus is on survival, of the day, the week, the season of work. Unfortunately, I am rendered blind to the joys found even on the busiest of days.

Pause

The last two weeks has seen us busy at work but taking time every other day to invite friends over. Normally, this would make me insane as I load my plate with more busyness, but in the context of finding my smile, this practice has proved invaluable. The preparations made in anticipation of the visitor are done with joy and from the moment the visitor arrives time slows to a crawl and I can breathe again. Perspective is altered and righted. Priorities scrubbed out and rewritten. Laughter is the new language and a smile emerges.

When true friends meet in adverse hour;
'Tis like a sunbeam through a shower.
A watery way an instant seen,
The darkly closing clouds between."
- Sir Walter Scott

Pausing one's agenda, breaking open the schedule to find time in abundance. Sitting, not stirring, while a friend speaks of their life, work put on the back burner, or perhaps completely forgotten. Existing in this moment, because this moment contains this person.

Alone I cannot

 Two are better than one,
   because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down,
   one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls
   and has no one to help them up.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 

Tired, weary, stressed...a myriad of maladies, a recipe for self-centered pity. The remedy comes in the curling up on a friend's couch, being offered tea and cookies and looking into someone's eyes as they speak words of wisdom, truth and friendship. The remedy comes in leaving the dirty dishes for later, offering another coffee and a slice of cake after dinner and together watching the clouds roll in, the promise of a storm to come, under the big umbrella in the evening meant to celebrate old friends and make new. The remedy comes in putting off every plan made early in the morning in order to take hold of the chance to see a friend one more time before we say goodbye for...ever?

The stopping, the slowing, the looking, the listening....